The power of friendship
Yesterday I was on my way to spend some much needed one-on-one girl time with one of my very best friends and I had some alone time in the car to reflect. You see, I normally fill my time in the car with phone calls, but yesterday I left my phone at home. As I was thinking about how thankful I was to spend time with Kirsten, it hit me how God has placed the exact right person in my life for whatever need I have.
It all started on my very first day of dorm life in college. My parents had just pulled out of the parking lot and I was feeling a major sense of shock and sadness. What in the world was I going to do all by myself in a new town?!? To put it mildly; I was terrified. I don't even remember now which one of us made the phonecall, but before I knew it I was on the phone with Bonney, and she was expressing the same feelings I was. From that moment on, I had a best friend and confidant in Bonney. She had the same close bond to her parents as I did, and we were going to make it through this college thing together. We ate meals together, bought books together, and made new friends together. After we suffered through dorm life, we lived together the remaining three years of undergrad. I never felt alone again.
While still in college, I somehow got involved in founding a sorority at UGA. I ventured into that endeavor with someone who was a good friend at the time, but I was quickly realizing that she and I were very different people. Around that time, we welcomed our very first class of initiates. This may sound very strange, but the very first time I saw Kirsten I instantly knew we were going to be the best of friends! She and I had a lot of the same qualities, and it turns out she lived in the same apartment complex as me (it's funny how so many of my closest college friends, and future husband, all lived right there at the luxurious River Club). Anyway, the rest was history. Some of my favorite memories were around that pool. That's where she and I discussed my future relationship with Bryan, and where I skipped class for the very first time. She's still someone who I can talk to about life's biggest problems.
Fast forward to the "real world". It was my very first busy season when my mom was diagnosed with cancer. I was overwhelmed in every sense of the word. She had been sick for a few months at this point, and Bryan and I had made the decision to move to Atlanta, which meant my mom moved with us. Shortly after the move, my mom took a turn for the worse, and I was at my wits end. I'll never forget the moment that Susan reached out to me. I was standing out on the back porch getting some fresh air, and my cell phone rang. I didn't know the number, but as exhausted as I was, I answered it anyway. It was Susan. We had talked on multiple occasions, and were beginning to develop a friendship, but she took a leap of faith and reached out to me. She thought I might need someone to talk to about my mom. Boy was she right. I needed her like nothing else. Susan literally held me up at times during my mom's illness and after she passed. She was able to give me a perspective that most people couldn't. She had experienced family illness in her life, and she was a mom herself. Since my mom's personality was so altered from the brain cancer, it was rare that she and I could have real conversations. There were many times that I felt Susan completely stepped in and said what my mom couldn't. She loved me and cared for me in a very unconditional way. We still do dinner about once a month, and they are always 3+ hour conversations. It's good for my soul to talk to her.
After my mom passed, I quickly realized that one of the times I felt most sad and missed my mom the most was in the car. I know that sounds strange, but I always called my mom while I was in the car - and she was always there to talk to me. I didn't have that anymore. Sure I could call lots of people, but there was no one who I could just talk to about everything for a really long time. Enter Kristina. She started work, and we became fast friends (notice a theme here?). We began talking to each other before and after work (and obviously often during work when we were at a client together) on our long car rides. Sometimes we would talk for two hours a day, and we'd cover just about every topic under the sun. We could banter back and forth about nothing, or cover really serious topics. It drove our husbands crazy sometimes because one of us would get home before the other, but we'd just keep on talking. Honestly, it would probably be embarassing to add up how much time we've spent on the phone total. When I got home from Paris, we broke a record on the phone. That's just how our bond works - some people hug it out, we talk it out.
Most recently when I started work at Coke, God put two more people in my life. I was terrified to start work and start over on friendships. I was so close to my friends at PKM. What if I didn't find anything like that at Coke? I can't say that I'll ever find anyone like Susan or Kristina, but I have found some people who make coming to work really great. On my very first day of work I met Valerie. She sat down at that big conference table across from me, and I felt a little more at ease. She and Bryan wen to law school together, and though that certainly didn't mean that she and I knew each other well - she was a familiar face! Since then, she's become my gym partner, my lunch date, and we're even starting a Young Professionals group at Coke (that's big stuff people). I have also made fast friends with Nipa. I met her on my second audit at Coke, and she's the closest thing I'm going to find to a "Kristina" (Kris - please note the appropriate use of quotation marks). She's that person who will wait for you and walk into a group meeting together, she'll save me a seat at a table, and always remember to ask me what my lunch plans are. We talk about a lot more than just work, and I always look forward to the days when she's working downtown.
I don't say all of this to brag about my awesome friends (but really, they are amazing), but I say it because I believe God always places the exact right person in your life at the exact right moment. Some of these friendships were always there, but were just taken to a different level due to a life event. All of these people are still my very closest friends. It's hard for me to say I have a best friend because really I have multiple best friends. In fact, I haven't even mentioned all of them here - only the ones that were made my best friend through life changing events. I would actually be remiss to not mention Amy (who is only the best sister-in-law in the world), and Elizabeth, who functions as my constant reminder of what it means to be a strong woman. I am also certain there are relationships that will change and become more powerful in my future. I feel beyond blessed to be surrounded by a group of women that are so powerful and influental. I am certain I would not be the person I am today without their constant love and support. I always strive to be the kind of friend to them that they are to me. That kind of love changes lives.
