Heartbeat
Originally written 9/26/12
I've heard people say before that hearing their baby's heartbeat for the first time is the most beautiful sound in the world. Can I please just go ahead and say a big ole' amen to that one? Today was our pregnancy confirmation appointment. I picked Bryan up outside of his office at 10:30 and we made our way to the doctor's office for our 11:00 ultrasound appointment followed by an 11:30 doctor's appointment. I was nervous, yet I felt a reassuring sense of peace. I reminded myself that I have been in the room when doctors have delivered life altering news. The worst thing that I could find out today was that I wasn't going to have a baby this May. We had gotten pregnant in the first place, so I wasn't going to hear that we could never have a baby. Whatever they had to say, I could take it. I may not like it, but God's plan is always so much better than ours.
So there we were. In the waiting room of the ultrasound office. My doctor's office had given me a ton of paperwork to fill out, so I got busy doing that and Bryan played around on his phone. We ended up waiting an excrutiating 50 minutes - they were having some sort of issue with someone. So I did my best to wait patiently, realizing that someone else was likely having a much worse day than mine. We finally got called back and I got all situated. She was very gracious in not making us wait for the good news. Almost as soon as she started, she said a little congratulatory "oh yay!", and then flipped the switch so we could hear the heartbeat. It was CRAZY. Completely crazy. This little person growing inside of me that is almost the size of a green olive has a HEARTBEAT. That blows my mind. And a very strong heartbeat at that - 167 bpm. Then she turned the monitor around and let us see what she was seeing. It's really just a blob on the screen - but you could see the heartbeat flickering. It was amazing. I looked over at Bryan and the amount of love I felt at that moment was intense. I was pretty sure I would start ugly crying right there. Everything measured perfectly and after quite a few tears and congratulations, I got dressed and we headed over to the doctor's office (just across the hall).
Once we got over to the doctor's office, my nurse immediately asked to see the picture of our little peanut. She's so sweet, and has been so kind to me each time I'm in the office. She weighed me, took my blood pressure and explained what our doctor's visit would be like. Mainly just talking and asking questions. Dr. Lawson then came and got us with a big smile on her face. I felt like both Dr. Lawson and Kimberly were genuinely happy for us! Dr. Lawson explained that everything on the ultrasound looked perfect and told us that after a strong heartbeat the chance of miscarriage decreases from 25% to only 3%. Of course things can still happen, but they are much less likely. I felt a HUGE sense of relief and peace. We talked a lot more about what I can and cannot do, she explained how my appointments will go, and what kinds of screenings I can get. I then asked her my list of questions, and she walked us up to the front to make our next appointment. I think I literally skipped out of the office. Bryan and I just gave each other big goofy smiles. And then we ate mexican for lunch. Typical.
Now comes the really fun part. The part I've been thinking about and waiting for ever since we started talking about having a baby. Telling people. I literally wanted to call every single person I know on the way from the doctor's office to lunch. Which was only approximately 2 minutes. Instead, we crafted our plans. We want it to be special. We've waited five years to have a baby, and our family and friends have waited with us. Never bugging us. Never asking questions. So we will do our very best to make this a special memory for them as well.
And to end on a good note - a picture for you. First an ultrasound pic, then a belly pic. We'll take these weekly from now on.
